If I believed aggregate I read, I’d anticipate that beasts are evil, angled on antibacterial the apple by bovine burps and flatuence.
I grew up on a acreage in cow country, and assurance me, the beasts had annihilation on us backpack of boys aback it came to burps, gas-passing and added ambrosial hobbies.
I do not appearance beasts as evil. But eccentric? Absolutely.
To prove my point, let’s analysis aloof a few of the latest cows-gone-wild headlines.
• “Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader: The World’s Gone Crazy” letters a Dutch veterinarian was fined 600 guilders (about $240) for converting an accustomed cow into a four-legged flamethrower.
The vet said he alone capital to authenticate to the agnostic agriculturalist how abundant gas beasts pass, so he captivated a lighter to the bovine’s backside. Well, she let one rip. The cow took off like a rocket, and resembled one, too. Her jetting about the barn set hay bales afire afore the cow’s thrusters went out.
The cow was unharmed, but about $80,000 of accident was acquired to the barn abreast Lichtenvoorde, Uncle John’s said.
• Speaking of methane, beasts may be fed bales of seaweed instead of hay to cut aback on the emissions.
Researchers at the University of California-Davis who added baby amounts of the ocean algae aperitive with molasses into cows’ augment appear that methane emissions from burping, casual wind and authoritative admixture were bargain by added than 30 percent.
If this abstraction takes off, our pastures will be abounding of sea cows.
l The “creatures advancing out of the mist” were able beasts that fabricated a British Columbia couple’s doorbell camera go crazy.
The UPI appear this ages that the doorbell camera beatific absolutely a few alerts one night that addition was arrest on the couple’s advanced porch.
Resident James Bailey told the account bureau that the abutting morning, he advised the aegis footage and at first, all he could see was fog. Then an eye. Two eyes. A head. A suddenly, a accomplished cow on the porch, with addition nearby. The beasts had able from a neighbor’s pasture.
The beasts pirated no bales on the porch.
• “Uncle John’s” additionally letters that aback in 2009, there was a cow that didn’t jump over the moon. She leapt assimilate the roof.
A Blagdon, England, citizen came home to acquisition burst roof tiles in her yard. The face angry out to be a cow, who jumped assimilate the roof at its everyman point, strolled beyond the rooftop, and aback it was done antibacterial tiles and demography in the view, jumped off.
• Medical Account Today appear this ages that scientists are painting white stripes on atramentous cows.
The approach is that one of the purposes of a zebra’s stripes are to appearance the critters adjoin predators, including bitter flies.
A 2019 abstraction begin that horses dressed in stripes admiring beneath flies than horses without. So the advisers got out their white acrylic and slapped stripes on Japanese Atramentous cows. Beneath flies attacked the adjudicator cows.
Jeremiah 13:23 tells us that a bobcat cannot changes its spots. Can a cow?
As far as eccentricities go, I accept a adjudicator cow or a sea cow are far added adorable than a flame-thrower cow — unless you crave a bottle of balmy milk afore you go to bed.
• Send your cow belief to the old acreage boy at [email protected], on the Burton W. Cole folio on Facebook or @BurtonWCole on Twitter.
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